Week 1 of 6: Complete ✅

If you’re reading this, it means I’ve officially completed Week 1 of 6 of radiation.

Honestly, everything has gone much more smoothly than I expected. I’m cautiously optimistic and hoping it stays that way, although nearly everyone has warned me that the side effects tend to be cumulative, with Weeks 3 and 4 often being the toughest. So far, aside from a mild headache on Day 1, I’ve been feeling surprisingly good.

At the same time as radiation, I’ve also been going through fertility treatments to freeze my eggs before starting chemotherapy. While radiation is expected to spare my fertility, chemotherapy can significantly impact it. It’s surreal how everything lined up.

One strange “benefit” of a brain cancer diagnosis is that it forces you to think about your future much sooner than you expected. I’ve never been someone who felt a strong, lifelong desire to have children. My attitude was always, “If I meet the right person, great.” It was never something I actively planned because my career always came first.

When you’re in your twenties, you assume that by your forties everything will naturally fall into place. For me, that meant:

Being married, maybe with children.
Having a stable, sustainable filmmaking career.

Life had other plans.

Neither of those milestones happened on the timeline I imagined, and brain cancer certainly wasn’t on my bingo card.

Since I’d already met my insurance deductible this year, I decided it was the right time to preserve my fertility. When I first picked up my medications, I nearly fainted. Due to a coding issue, everything rang up at full price. One hormone injection was $8,000. Another was $10,000.

Seriously… what?!

Thankfully, after a lot of research and phone calls, I learned there’s an important distinction between elective and medically necessary fertility preservation. In California, if you’re about to undergo treatment that may permanently affect your fertility, egg retrieval becomes a medically necessary procedure and is covered by insurance.

Once everything was corrected, I officially began the egg retrieval process. What I’ve learned about myself is… I absolutely hate giving myself injections. This completely shocked me.

I was an EMT. I started IVs on patients all the time. I honestly thought giving myself a tiny injection would be easy.

Nope.

One day it literally took me two hours to give myself two shots because I simply couldn’t get past the mental block.

I tried everything:

Taking off my glasses so I couldn’t see the needle.
Turning off the lights.
Countdown methods.
Pep talks.
Bargaining with myself.

None of it worked.

Eventually, I surrendered and started recruiting friends to stab me instead.

The ever-growing list of people who have injected me is honestly becoming one of the funniest parts of this experience. Thank you to everyone who stepped up—even those of you who admitted you hate needles yourselves.

Current leaderboard:

Daran (the MVP)
Elizabeth
Jon
Roxy
Matthew L.
Matthew H.

Another unexpected blessing has been qualifying for the radiation apartments.

Because I receive treatment Monday through Friday in Hollywood, staying there saves me from commuting every day from Van Nuys—a trip that can easily cost $40 each way and several hours sitting in Los Angeles traffic.

It has been an absolute gift.

Instead of spending my energy commuting, I now have a quiet place to stay, an office where I can work, and the ability to focus on healing. It honestly feels a little like “radiation camp”—just with much better Wi-Fi.

Even better… I started teaching piano again!

Considering everything that’s happened over the past few months, I genuinely feel incredibly fortunate. I’m feeling well, my treatment is going smoothly, my fertility preservation is covered, I have a temporary home close to treatment, and I’m slowly getting pieces of my normal life back.

There are still five weeks to go, and I know things may become more difficult. But if brain cancer has taught me anything, it’s not to borrow tomorrow’s worries before they arrive.

For now, I’m celebrating the victories that exist today.

Thank you to everyone who has checked in, visited, sent messages, helped with injections, or simply made time to spend with me. Your kindness has carried me through more than you probably realize. I feel incredibly loved and have not once felt alone in this shitty process.

Here’s hoping Week 2 is just as uneventful.

🤞❤️

Falling Foward | Radiation Camp Week 1 Completed